Friday, April 30, 2010

Inches Gone!

Hubbs measured me last night.
3/25 of an inch lost off my stomach
1/2 inch off my arm
woo freakin hoo!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Bob vs Jilian

You know how I always complain about Bob?

Well, as of yesterday, he's a knight in shining armour.

Jilian kicked my ass yesterday.
I couldn't do most of what she was demanding.
(partly bc I was on carpet & not a gym floor)

And she is not "attractively fit." (words from MA)
Her legs look like stumps.
My vision was blurred from only seeing her waist...
I do not want to look like that. ew

And the other girl, the blonde body builder woman, is intense.
I could do most of what she demanded but it seemed pointless.
But I did it anyway.

I have never sweated as much as I did yesterday.
I liked it. Made it feel worth while.

Monday, April 26, 2010

False Hope Sucks

I didn't go to fat doctor Friday...

I went today.
& now know that Monday is the day to go,
not Friday when everyone else is there.

As you know, I ask them not to tell me what the scale says.
Because I go by mine at home.
They don't take me seriously...
I step off the scale and hear, "OMG, you've lost 6 lbs!"
So, I look down at what she wrote. 180.
As calmly as I could, I said, "No, I haven't. My scale has said that amount for at least the last 3 weeks."

Obviously, I am pissed.

I think I'm going to throw my scale away.
Or have the hubbs hide it and make him swear to not get it out no matter how much I beg or get pissed at him.

I got 2 shots.
1 in each hip.
That sucked.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Still stuck at 180...

Didn't I call this yesterday?

And hubbs was a very bad influence last night.
Which in short, means I didn't work out.
& we ate out.
But I did have a salad, sweet potato and steak tips that I barely ate because they were gross.

Ever since researching that blood type diet my stomach curls at the thought of red meat and what it's doing to my body.

Slowly but surely my mind is getting to the right place, maybe...

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Observation

I worked my ass off last night.
Or maybe I should say Bob worked my ass last night.
Well, that doesn't sound good either...

ANYWAY, I feel a difference.
But I'm not sure where.
I assume it should be my face or arms,
but I don't see anything there.

So, I'm standing in the hubbs' bathroom naked, staring at myself in the mirror. Naturally, he walks in. "WTF are you doing?" he asks. "I feel like something is different but I don't know what." I answer. Without a second to even think, he points right to it. And all be damned if he ain't right on the money. I have to stare for a little while longer just to be sure, but he's found the spot. Of course, it's not anywhere that is a measurement area.

It's the ab area right under my breasts and right above my prego appearing belly. They used to look like 2 halves of donuts. But not anymore! They'e not completely fat free by any means, but they are smaller. That is instant happiness. Makes me feel like just maybe my hard efforts are working!

Tomorrow is weigh in day.
And we all know I will still be stuck at 180.
But I am going to get my lipo shot tomorrow, that I didn't get last week, and maybe that'll pump something into gear! *crosses fingers*

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Struggling

I am still stuck at 180.
I've been taking phentermine for 11 days now.
My original 5 lb loss was before the phentermine.
I am straight up livid.

I knew better than to get my hopes up and assume it was going to work for me like it has everyone else. The only thing it's done is make it hard to eat and sleep.

I slacked at working out last week,
but have been doing good this week so far.

I may have lost inches.
Hubbs is going to measure me tonight.
Hopefully I can find where I wrote the last ones down...

Monday, April 19, 2010

Cuteness

I got this in an email:

With time, women gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.

Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, Good grief, look how smart I am!

Must be where 'Smart Ass' came from!

Friday, April 16, 2010

180, still

Yes, I know I said I wasn't going to weigh.

But I tried on a pair of shorts that I got from a friend last weekend and they fit different than they originally had so I got super excited.

I begged hubbs to get the scale out of hiding.
He originally told me no...
But obviously gave in with time.

I should have waited.
I haven't lost any.
Yes, I realize I haven't gained either.

But 6 days of phentermine should have shed at least a few pounds!

I am trying really hard to not get discouraged...
I am not going to get my lipo shot today.
I lost 3 lbs without it. We shall see what happens.

Monday, April 12, 2010

3 days in

Got phentermine Friday.
It's not Adipex, it's the generic.
But, it only cost me $5 for a month supply.
If it works, that's awesome!

It's made me feel funny, but not bad.
I'm hoping I will get used to it and that will go away.

I also go my lipo shot.
She did it nice and slow so it didn't burn too bad.

Best part is, I almost chickened out.
But they were out of the lipo pills so I had no other choice.

Hubbs still hasn't hid the scale.
So, of course, I got on it this morning.
It said 180! I almost died. Right there.
That's a 2 lb loss since Friday.
He's supposed to hide it today though because I don't want to weigh for 2 weeks. Yes, I changed from the original 4...

I am sooo scared of losing it too fast and getting flabby.
I'm going to bust my ass this week doing strength training.

Friday, April 9, 2010

Blood Type Diet

Went to chiropractor today.
He asked me my blood type.
I told him A Positive.
He then told me I needed to be a vegetarian.

Um, what?!?

He believes there is specific foods to eat and not eat for your blood type to maintain a healthy body.

So, you know me, I Googled it.
Turns out he's not the only one to think that.

I looked into it.
It makes sense, but then it doesn't.

My first thought was "oh, I could do this and eat seafood."
But most of the seafood I would eat is on the 'not allowed' list.

I'm considering it, kinda.
It's not like I haven't tried everything else.
Why not try this to?

Here's a website if you're interested.

182

Another pound lost.
Though I'm not jumping for joy.

I didn't work out yesterday.
I won't make any excuses...

Goin to fat doctor today.
Gonna go back to the lipo shots
(instead of takin the easy way out: pills.) Eek!
& get the Adipex.

I am not going to weigh again until May 7.
That's 4 weeks.
I don't want to get discouraged too fast.
I want to give the Adipex time to work.

So, wish me luck!
I totally need it!

Thursday, April 8, 2010

attn: walkers!

I know that more of you walk!
So, just join me here!
My sn is JessCaylor.

I did a mile on the treadmill last night.
Can't even remember the last time I used it!

Yes, I know I could've/should've done more.
But I wanted to try the p90x ab ripper dvd.
Um, it was a complete joke.
I ended up doing a million crunches because I couldn't do most of what they were doing. I think it's more for people who already have abs of steel! srsly

Hubbs said I should've done the core dvd first. oops
I'm not stupid. I know I have no core strength.
Zero! Nada! no lie

But tonight is Bob night, so it'll have to wait.
Even though I'm still sore from Bob on Monday night,
I'm going to just keep on trucking.

Tomorrow is weigh in day... Eek!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Wallpaper

Thought I'd share w/you my new computer wallpaper...



I hate Bob!

Really!
I really really really do!

I hadn't worked out since Thursday (except my mile walk Monday) and dealing w/him and all his lunges & trunk rotations has me sore again. Granted, I am not as sore as I was the first time but sore enough to work my nerves.

Let me just say this:
If I don't have an ass like Kim Kardashian, SOON, I'm gonna be even more hateful. I want to see these lunges pay off. And like, now!

Yes, I realize that I will LOVE Bob in time.
But not until this fat starts melting off faster!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Walk Off the Weight

Thanks to Donna, THIS was brought to my attention.


If you want to join, my screenname is JessCaylor.


Come on, join the fun!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Rock Bottom

I've officially hit rock bottom.
And it's really painful down here.

It has warmed up here and I'm sick of wearing sweaters.
So, I went through my closet yesterday.
That was a really bad idea.
Nothing fits. I do mean nothing.
Well, it fits. But it looks disgusting.
It took every bit of self control I had to not go put my face in the toilet and throw up my guts.

And I'll be honest, I got to the toilet.
But somehow held back from putting my finger down my throat.
I settled for lots and lots and lots of tears.

While sitting on the bathroom floor, a lightbulb went off.
*I have my priorities all jacked up.*

For instance, I haven't worked out since Thursday.
Why? Let's just say I DO NOT have a good excuse.
From here forward my weightloss is my Top Priority. Period.

No more going and doing stuff to distract me.
If I want to do something then it will have to be after I work out.
Telling myself I'll do it later obviously does not work.

For the past few months my goal has been to lose weight so I could buy a cute outfit to wear to the Bon Jovi concert. Has that worked? No. Which means it's time for short term goals. Like every week. Maybe you think that's not good. But it's clear that long term goals are not working for me.

My goal for this week is 2 lbs. (181)


Friday, April 2, 2010

Slacked

I didn't work out yesterday.
So, I only made it 4 days in a row.

But I got some much needed sleep.
And we all know how important that is.

I forgot to weigh myself before I got dressed this morning.
I weighed 184, dressed.
I'm going to say I have a pound of clothes on and go with 183.
Which is 2 lbs lost. Not enough. ugh

Anyway, I told hubbs to hide the scale. Again.
I'm gonna bust my ass for a month, then weigh.

I'm to the point of not caring about the number so much as how I look.

I had a nervous fit the other day and started tucking and pulling stuff. Figured out that if I can tuck and move it then it can go away. No more making excuses of "oh, I'll always have these hips and thighs." No more excuses, period.

I am not going to the fat doctor today.
I have enough Bontil to last til next Friday and then I'll get the Adipex.
But that means I won't have the lipo pills for a week.
We will see how that goes.
I honestly think I'm going to have to just suck it up and get the shots instead of pills again.

Beauty IS pain, right?